What Do The Elections and Parenting Have In Common? – Perspective

What Do The Elections and Parenting Have In Common? – Perspective

Perspective is a crazy thing…

In case you missed it we are currently in an election year… and there is NO POSSIBLE WAY you have missed it. As with any election year you can’t seem to turn on the television or go online without being reminded of it.

There is no escaping and we will all be prisioners of this god awful shit show of a mess until November 9th. At least hopefully it will end there but with Donald Trump saying things like this it’s anybody’s guess. Let’s just say that no matter who you support we are all looking forward to this fiasco to be over.

Currently we are living in a country that is so divided and let’s be honest this election isn’t doing anything to bring us together as a nation. It seems to only be making it worse.

I will admit that for quite a while now I have spent the better part of this election trying – and failing – to understand how people could support someone like Donald Trump. At first it was simply because of his lack of political experience – I mean did we really want a reality tv star to run our country?


Apparently there are quite a few people who were ok with that. Then I couldn’t understand why people continued to support him when he starting saying the most outlandish and offensive things I had ever heard from a politician. It made no sense to me.

I would scream at my TV on a regular basis – during the debates, during interviews and even at the commercials that he would run. I decided to sit down and really try to understand it or at least try to find a little glimmer of reason behind it all. Then it hit me – perspective. It is all about perspective.

Going through life with blinders on and only seeing things from your side of the fence is never a good thing. It leaves you blind to other options, other ideas, understanding and compassion.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I still have a very hard time understanding Trump supporters and why they would follow a person of his ilk but I at least felt I needed to try. But let me tell you – it’s damn hard.

Currently in this election season – having been one of the worst that I personally have ever seen I am faced with new problems and new issues to look at. New things that I unfortunately now have to discuss with my children.

When they come to me and ask:

“Why are those people yelling mean things about Mexicans?”

“Mommy, my friend at school is crying and scared that if Donald Trump wins the election that she and her family will be sent away because they are Muslim”

“Mommy, why does he hate Muslims?”

“Why are all these people so mean to each other?”

And then, having to explain and discuss the vile things that were spoken on a bus by a grown man who should have known better. Having to have a discussion with my teenage boys about assault and why what he said was so offensive to me as a woman. And to ensure that they knew (which they already did but due to these circumstances I felt I REALLY needed to drive the point home) that is it NEVER ok to touch a woman without her permission.

It is NEVER ok to touch a woman without her permission!

Trying to explain why someone running for the highest office in the world is acting less mature than my 9 year old is not an easy thing to do. Much less trying to explain why he is that odd orange color.

And as much as this election has enraged me at times I do have to take a step back and realize that some people who follow and support Trump maybe just don’t get it. Maybe they don’t understand why some of the things that he says are so terrible to most of the rest of us in the country. Perspective.

Their experiences in life are different than mine. They have lived things that I have not. Been taught things that I have not. And vice versa. I have experienced life differently. We all have. My perception of a situation is different than that of my red neck uncle back home in Virginia. To him I am a bleeding heart liberal. To me he is a backwoods neanderthal red neck.

We were raised differently. We learned things differently. Our experiences have dictated the way we view the world, other people and of course politics. And while I don’t agree with him, I can at least understand that.

I have to deal with this when working with my ex to co-parent our daughter. I regularly have to remind myself that HIS experiences growing up were vastly different than mine. His home was not always a happy one. There were many things that happened in his life that I know scarred him. And I know that they effect how he parents – there is no way they can’t.

I have to remember that while my father was my hero and to this day is the man I go to when I am hurt, upset or in need of consult or consoling – his father was not a nice man. When I think of the type of father I would wish for my daughter it would be one like mine was. My ex doesn’t have that comparison to make.

He only wants to ensure that she DOESN’T have a father like he did.

And I can understand that. So I have to remember that when I try to hold him to a standard that he may never meet. Because he never experienced it. And that isn’t fair to him.

Perspective … it’s all about perspective. And while we may not ever fully understand another person’s perspective on things it is important to remember that they HAVE a different perspective. And in doing so it makes it a little easier to at least be civil, get along, find common ground and compromise. You don’t have to completely agree, but you do have to respect another’s ability to have a different opinion and perspective helps with that.

Oh and Go Hillary #ImWithHer (because I sure as hell can’t get behind a man like Donald Trump)

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